Our new "normal" :o)

Meet Ezra Michael Taras :o) Isn't he just adorable!!!!???!!! Well, the Lord made sure he was cute because of the following:

Labor was pretty rough- they almost had to take him by Cesarean. Thanks to God's grace and an amazing doctor, that didn't happen! We had to stay extra days in the hospital because he was jaundiced. Which also meant that he had to stay under the bilirubin lights and we couldn't hold him. :o( We finally get to come home from the hospital (yay!) only to find that he would scream around the clock. (boo!) So after about 2 weeks of no sleep and scream sessions that would last anywhere from 2-6 hours at a time, the doctor concluded that he had Gastroesophageal Reflux Disease. (GERD) Which means that his little muscle at the base of his esophagus isn't functioning properly, therefore whatever he eats comes back up very painfully. Hence, all the screaming.

So here we are at week 7 and things are looking much better! (Yay!) His medications finally seem to be working. However, since he has GERD, we've been very careful about not letting him cry since it only adds more pain to his already raw throat. Which means, anytime he's fussed, we've held him: nights included. Now from the hours of 2am and 6am he wakes up every 30 minutes and fusses unless we wake up and give him his pacifier. So now it's "D day". Baby wise sleep training!!! He really has to learn to put himself back to sleep and stay asleep so that he can get the sleep he needs (and so can WE!) Plus, this will help me give him his around the clock medications more consistently on time.

So how are the rest of us doing?!

Naomi has been a WONDERFUL big sister! She just loves Ezra so much and loves to help out any way she can. She's an expert "burper". In fact, there are times that I can't get Ezra to burp...and all I have to do is call on Naomi! ;o) She has started school and is doing wonderful with that! I'm thankful for an independent child!

Dallas is so wonderful! I am thankful for him! He has been awesome through this whole process, taking feedings and helping during the screaming fits- even when he has to be at work early! It's been a sweet blessing watching him have a son. We've been doing a lot of talking about Mike (Dallas' dad) and how there are so many things that Dallas appreciated about him that he wants to pass on to his own son. It's bittersweet and we wish that Papa Mike were here to enjoy his grandkids!

I'm hanging in there! I'm absolutely in LOVE with my little guy- he is so precious! This past week I had my 6 week postpartum doctors visit. As I sat there in her office, I realized that it has been exactly one year ago that I was sitting in her office with a broken heart hoping that she would have an answer as to why I keep having miscarriages. Now I have a beautiful baby boy! God is so faithful! Even this past Sunday at church (YAY! I got to go to church finally!!!!) as we were singing "Blessed be the name of the Lord" it hit me like a ton of bricks. For the past two years that song has held such meaning to me. That even when the Lord "takes away" He is good. He has a beautiful purpose behind every painful trial that I endure. I have sang that song in church and in private over the years and my heart just burst! It's such a hard truth to sing and confess when life hurts. Now I was able to stand there with my little baby and sing that song as an offering of thanks for the times that the Lord "gives". God is so good!! These past few weeks have also been a "testing" ground, if you will, for all the Lord has taught me about His grace. As I sat for hours on end trying desperately to comfort my little baby, not being able to read any books, or my bible, not being able to go to church, talk on the phone, or even listen to any sermons online (all due to the screaming) the Lord has shown me that there is NOTHING that I can do to make him love me more or less. I can't earn his favor. He sank that truth so deep in my heart over the past couple of months and I am so thankful for that! It's not about what we DO it's about who Jesus IS and what He's DONE! We can just rest in Him! What a beautiful hope!! :o)

So we are just getting back into the swing of life. Slowly but surely! I'm so thankful for my sweet family of 4!!!!! What a blessing!

***and for those who've not heard this song, here it is on you tube***